Tuesday, March 18th, 2003
I have several goals at this time… some of the goals are kind of going hazy and it seems to effect the others as well; the other goals which should be one of those ‘do-it-without-question’ kinds of goals are becoming ‘but-i-need-to-prioritize-this-first-don’t-i’ kinds of goals and its spreading like a wildfire to all my other goals.
I have been at work with my new job and this seems to be the only thing that I actually like doing now. Know why? Because I get to work on something I like and I get to learn new things about it and since I’m interested in it, it’s not too difficult…. wait a minute, now that I think about it, that kinda sounds like this other goal should be clear as a bright day =o
What do you want me to do? It’s a rather difficult situation – or maybe I’m making it like that but it’s still difficult for me to act on considering I got so many other things going on – I wish this was just an excuse because that means that I don’t have much to do.
You know, I wish I could multi-think… then I can allocate a bit of my brain to think about this one issue while the rest of the brain can concentrate on something else.
damn it, I’m a moron and have been stupid, period.
have a good night
Posted in Time Out! | No Comments »
Monday, March 17th, 2003
It feels like the walls are closing in on me from all directions. I’m blocked off every direction I turn and I feel trapped. I’ve been thinking about how I can get out of it all but then if I choose this then I will still be falling into the abysmal.
Posted in My Life | 1 Comment »
Sunday, March 16th, 2003
I’ve been kept busy this past week; both mentally and emotionally… but just not physically because I didn’t do anything physical this past week except saturday but then I wasn’t doing much either but running around a little.
Okay so here’s a recap:
Mentally
There wasn’t much going on this week in school except a test in DiffEqs. I don’t know how I did on the test – but I think I spent a bit too much time on one part of a question. This might’ve hurt me badly. Last test, I did relatively well considering the fact that I thought I did horribly. I should’ve gotten the test back on Friday but I decided not the go to class because I was so busy that whole week and I had something on my mind (as usual 
).
I also had to do a french skit – my group was in class and we were practicing, that’s the first time we’d actually rehearsed it. It was like a 40 second skit – a thousand times easier then the 20 minute conversations that I did in IB French Oral exams… so it wasn’t too much of a big deal for me except I had to do this skit in front of the class and my french professor likes us to pronounce everything correctly. In the previous 7 years that I was taught french in middle school and high school, I’ve never knew that making liasons through pronounciation could change the tone of it from informal to formal. I mean, yea – there are ways to do this in English – being more formal and polite in speech like using ‘May I…’ instead of ‘Can I…’ etc… and also the formal Korean and informal Korean – but making the small ‘T’ sound in between words made the difference in French. How come I did not know this until this year? Anyways, we were rehearsing together and the three of us just could not keep a straight face because we don’t know whose part comes when nor when it ends… so we were all just looking at each other trying to determine who had the next line. But it wasn’t bad- we got up there and I don’t think we made a single mistake except mispronouncing ‘personnes’ but everyone made this mistake. Remember, ‘personnes’ is pronounced: ‘peRe-sun’ and not ‘perSonne’ =P
Okay… so I’ve been working at my new job this past week. It’s a remote part time job with a company in PA. They are a well-established ISP up there and also power a lot of web hosting companies. This past week was rather hectic because someone decided that it was a good week to start attacking its network along with several other data centers in the United States. So the network was up and down and since I’m a remote tech – I highly depend on their network to be up so I can log into their servers and get work done. So, I couldn’t get much done although I got some stuff done… I’m actually working on a server right now. You’d be amazed how many people start up something they don’t know anything about and depend on people like me to help them run things along… well, this is fine though since it’s one of my jobs but some of the questions I get are just downright ridiculous. I was talking to couple of the on-site staff members through AIM – the ones that I extensively talked to were really nice when we aren’t having network problems since they are sitting at their workstation and diligently working through issues (I imagine). Anyways, I found out that staff members can house servers on their network if they provide the server – so I’m definitely going to have to look into that and find or build a server to send over there.
Okay thats about it mentally – I don’t know if I wanted to keep my mind busy or if I was actually busy with a lot of stuff to take care although I’m sure it was the latter – who knows.
Emotionally
For a lack of a better word – vacillating.
Why? Well – it might’ve just been coincidence but something happened thursday during lunch that I just could not stop thinking about every single day since then… It’s really stupid – I’m just making it a big deal and I really shouldn’t because it’s really going to effect my time negatively. But it’s amusing to think how much it keeps popping into my mind so randomly. Excuse my attempt at being vague to the point of probably getting irritating… but if you want to know what da hell I’m talking about then you’re just going to have to ask me.
All right so yea….
and ….
….
yep, that’s about it. comment on my lack of specifics and I’ll comment back with no specifics 
have a good night
Posted in Random | 1 Comment »
Monday, March 10th, 2003
So Spring Break 2003 has come and gone and I miss it already although it merely ended 23 hours ago. It seems like a great opportunity caught and swept away by the winds of time. Here’s a summary of Spring Break…
Okay so after an Econ test second to last friday, I was dead tired cause I only had couple of hours of sleep that night since I went to SAC to workout. But after that test, I was energized and went about with my classes until 4pm. Now, I started packing up my stuff after dinner around 8pm or so because we were planning on leaving at midnight. Got all packed up, took up my huge duffle bag with clothes and the other necessities for such vacations.
We ended up leaving at one after packing up our stuff among Scheibe and Drew’s cars. We divided up so that Dave and Chatty were riding with Scheibe and Jordan and I took a ride in Drew’s saturn.
On the road toward South Georgia – the only thing interesting that happened was seeing couple hundred “WE BARE ALL – COLLEGE DISCOUNT” boards… wow, there were a lot of those – I think it was only one strip club that advertised that much too. I think we should ban those types of advertisements on roads – I mean, geez, think of how many kids that are riding along with their parents!
Anyways, we stopped at a Waffle House because some of us got hungry. Got myself a quarter pound bacon cheese burger – it was good stuff because I haven’t had a non-brittain burger for a long time.
So right after that, we went to get some gas near the waffle house. This stop made part of our trip a bit adventurous… especially because Jordan was playing around and washing the windshields of both of our cars. So in the playing mood, Drew sprayed his windshield and started wiping them… now at that point, the forces that be… happened to make the handheld window washer and the windshield wiper make contact… making the windshield break. Usually – you can just click it back on.. but nope, the break was within the part of the hook so it didn’t stay on by itself. So after fidgeting around with it for 20minutes, we said whatever and left wishing that we’d have a dry trip down to Miami.
I think I fell asleep because when I came to… it was raining. But I think Drew’s car had one of those RainX chemicals on the windshield because the rain was just flying off the windshield without streaking much. So I think we drove for a couple hours in the rain like that until we just couldn’t see through the windshield because the rain came down strong… so in short, we stopped at this place (found out it was a like a gas station turned strip club but it seemed to have been closed) So Jordan just happened to have duct tape! So he covered the wipers with some duct tape…. and we were off. It worked well.
So later on we arrived in Sarasota to pick up Drew’s friend, Ed – nice guy – I could see how Drew and Ed were good friend hehe They were so alike in many ways then not.
So again, life went on – we were in North Miami beach. I’m not sure if I have the time to explain each day or not… but just believe it, it was great, it was fun, it was relaxing, it was motivating…
The ride back was … a bit tight but it was still all good. We dropped Chatty off at his place – petted his dogs – said hello to his dad and we were off again. We arrived in at around 1am Thursday morning.
Surprisingly enough – when I came back – I did not immediately go to sleep although my body was tired… but I started working for the new position I got the week before the break because I told my employer that I wanted to start working on Thursday.
So basically – guess what I did all through Sunday? I worked… I’m supposed to be working 20 hours per week as I’m part-time so in order to make up for the lost hours that whole spring break week, I worked a crapload of hours when I was back in my room.
I can say that the pay isn’t too great – it’s a salaried position with room to grow and offer to pay for my trip to Scranton, PA where they are based so I can meet all the other staff… and also asked if I was interested in working full time with them after I graduate. I was definitely interested although it doesn’t 100% relate to the degree I’m working to get but then again I read somewhere that 70% or something of college graduates have a career not even closely related to the degree(s) that they earned in school. The best thing I liked about this job was that the company is well-established. They now have 29 staff members – started providing services back in 1998.
I’ve also chatted with the CEO prior to my position and I thought he was very good with people and was friendly.
So anyways – was planning to do some school work today but I got bogged down with some other stuff
Have a good night!
Posted in My Life | No Comments »
